Business failures and bankruptcy took a toll on my self-esteem, but they also took a toll on our already ailing relationship. We lost our vehicles to foreclosures, had a debt to the IRS that of course we couldn't pay, and ultimately ended up losing our home. Sandi decided to go to work to help. I never really wanted her to work, but I knew she wanted to help me and we could definitely use the money. By the time she went to work, I was working from our house. I handled all the billing and shipping of the expert witness directory from home. We were able to buy a cheap used car, which Sandi took to work. Two of the children were in high school. They had part-time jobs and bought their own car. I know Sandi was as touched and humbled by our financial problems as I was. But she was also angry and I was the only one to blame. This was all my fault, I was the one who caused a change in his lifestyle. This was his mentality at the time and it was very evident in his actions towards me. After the initial business I started closed, she told me adamantly that she wanted nothing to do with any of my businesses. In fact, she wasn't going to help, she didn't want to talk about it, and she just didn't want to know anything about it. And that's how it happened for the next 5 or 6 years. Once Sandi went to work, I became the red-haired daughter-in-law. I worked in the business from our home. I was home all day. She thought her job was more important than mine. In his mind, she had become the breadwinner. In truth, at no time did she bring in more money than me. But honestly, I don't...... middle of paper ...... without failures, bankruptcies, repossessions, financial ruin and humiliation. I knew that with time, hard work and perseverance, these problems could be overcome. But I couldn't live with someone who didn't love me or who didn't bother to show it to me. I couldn't live with doubt – never knowing if what she said was the truth or just her own justification. I couldn't live with the disrespect or indifference. Enough time had passed, we had been together for almost 25 years. Hard work and perseverance didn't seem to be the answer – we had spent several years working with other married couples to try to develop and improve our relationship. The marriage had begun with some degree of coercion and dishonesty. For this reason, we have never been able to build the relationship of trust, love and intimacy that the sacrament of marriage requires and deserves...