Sanders avoids falling into what would be justifiable traps of self-pity while accepting his past. He is not angry with his father; and this is evident from the fact that he continually attempts to make excuses for his father's drinking habits. In fact, he never really blames her, he only blames her “illness”. Furthermore, it should be noted that his lack of self-pity could be due to one of two reasons: either that through his catharsis with the instrument of his essay he healed enough to wholeheartedly accept his past; or he avoided feeling sorry for himself because he filled himself with self-deprecation and feelings of guilt for not having been able to save his father, because he himself was strong enough to become helpless prey for his father.