Esther experiences an immense amount of pressure and confusion about where to focus her life's purpose and how to succeed in several areas and aspects of her life. Her confusion is acknowledged symbolically through the metaphor of the fig tree: “I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, dying of hunger because I could not decide which of the figs I would choose” (Plath 77). Esther is torn between choosing the life direction she wants for herself and the one that society and those close to her are pushing her to pursue. Much like Holden, Esther cannot tolerate the excessive expectations that society places on her. In chapter 10, Esther no longer cares about her own aesthetics, as she had maintained at the beginning of the novel. The immense pressure leads to Esther's mental and physical exhaustion, the start of her lack of self-care, and this is where the rapid decline in her mental health begins. This pivotal moment is signified when she admits that she had not wanted to wash away the wrinkles of dried blood that mark her cheeks (Plath